15 months, L&D #2, and other happenings

Last week was 15 months.  15 months since my daughter died, three months until my son is due.  Yeah.

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We hit up L&D again last weekend.  Everything's good; we just have to chill.  I mean, they didn't say that.  They said we can come by anytime we want - our doc and the whole L&D wing is the shit.

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Failed my one-hour glucose test last week.  Luckily, the 3-hour was fine.  Well, fine in that it was horrid, gross, yucky, exhausting, but I passed, so I'll take it. :)

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Starting to buy some clothes and things for Tuppy.  There's part of me, though, that still doesn't totally believe that this is happening.

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It's getting harder and harder to imagine what life would be like with Olivia.  And that sucks.

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I'm really, really tired.  But my schedule at work will lighten up a little bit this week until the end of the semester, so I'm hoping that will help.

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My husband is the shit.

L&D #1

We went to labor and delivery last night.

Everything is fine, but I didn't feel Tuppy for about 4 hours, and started freaking out.  It's early, and the periods of me not feeling him are going to happen - he's still pretty little - but that's what happened when we lost Olivia, so J. called and we went in last night.  Everything is fine; he was actually kicking in there but I wasn't feeling it, so we're good.

Note to self and to other people: when someone is telling you about how they were upset, even if it was over nothing, you telling them about how others' lives are sucking doesn't make the original person feel any better.  I mean, what is that?  Believe me, I'm grateful nothing is wrong.  Now you're just making me feel guilty about it.

Sigh.